Illness, Angst and Awesome plans.
I am a subject of debate and discussion among the doctors at the local teaching hospital ... this is both disheartening and deeply amusing to me. I've just come back from an appointment today with some possible new diagnoses and a new course or three of treatment (we're going to play the differential diagnosis game and try several different ones in best possible order).
Discussion with some friends though, both those in similar situations and those who aint (particularly Raindog who was made of awesome this evening) has lead me to some conclusions. Yes, the prospect of exciting disfiguring scarring and hair loss doesn't exactly have me jumping for joy, ( srsly, my hair is ridiculously wrapped up in my femme self identity) but I'ma make hard lemonade with these lemons ...
1. I have an awesome hat, I will get more awesome hats, they make me happy.
2. If I have to shave whatever is left off, because it just isn't working anymore, I am going to tattoo fantastic and wonderful things all over my damn head. If people (and me) are going to stare at scars and shit, lets give them something fun to look at.
3. I am going to become the Imelda Marcos of wigs. If I have to buy hair in a box, sod pretending it's 100% real, I am going to have all the fun with it I can. every style, every colour, every ridiculous goffik look I ever wanted as a grubby little teenage punk but never had the time/money/moxie for.
So there you have it, dear readers, maybe if I post about it I won't get all twitchy and ashamed about the whole thing or anything stupid like that. And more importantly ... what do you think I should tattoo on my head? 
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Maybe not a tattoo but I love the wigs idea. Lot's of them in many colours and styles if it's possible. What I've heard, those can be pretty expensive too.
I think a wreath of flowers around your head would be awesome, like a May-Day thing, only tattooed.
And: always wanted a PURPLE wig! Alex's mother in A CLOCKWORK ORANGE wore one and I've wanted one ever since...
Now this one I like the sound of, I'll have to start thinking about which flowers and how they'd be placed
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I shall add a purple wig to the list too
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